The Empire of United Mafia is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by The Godmother Taylor Sweet with an iron fist, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, public floggings, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 1.374 billion Mafiosos are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Law & Order, and Industry are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vice City. The average income tax rate is 24.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse United Mafian economy, worth 110 trillion Credits a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Automobile Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is notable. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 80,301 Credits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

The tax department is having withdrawal symptoms, sports fans complain that cricket tests now last an unbearable ten days, roads are often attended by round-the-clock construction crews, and citizens select which government department gets their income tax Credits each year. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. United Mafia's national animal is the Rat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Currency.

United Mafia is ranked 128,819^th in the world and 503^rd in Concord for Safest, scoring 68.94 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.